Thanks for the fish

day than a summer day today. It’s cold and dreary, overcast and intermittently rainy. We were out late last night “gallactic bowling” with some friends. It was sort of fun, but I drank too much beer, ate too much bowling alley food, and well, I can’t deny it… bowling kicked my ass. I started off strong with a spare, then as I got tireder and tireder (I know that’s not a word) I got worse and worse and got many many gutter balls. But oh well, better than sitting home on my birthday. : )

So we got home around 1 in the morning and you know I normally go to bed at 9, so yeah, that was way past my bedtime. Oh, and J took me out to a nice dinner too. I had hanger steak and garlic “smashed” potatoes and a cosmo. Anyway, so I slept till 11, got up, ate breakfast and then we tried to do some zen-ifying of the office. We had these magazines on a bookshelf in teh office, some that we’ve been toting around since 1998! So I went through them ruthlessly and tossed 99% of them. It’s silly the things you keep. Then, with all that extra space, we decided to go to borders. To help with my book research, I bought a bunch of books about pirates. : ) Call it synchronicity, but everywhere I went there was pirate stuff everywhere. Or else we can just assume that pirates are very popular and I’ve just never noticed it before. You decide. Then, I got to chatting with the cashier at borders and she assured me that there is buried treasure off the coast of Cliff Island in Casco Bay, left by Captain Kidd. Yes, you’re wondering where all this pirate stuff came from out of the blue. You’ll see when my novel comes out, which coincidentally I have to start actually writing tomorrow! Exciting.

So no garden tasks accomplished today because of the poopy weather. I have officially crossed off zero of 26 items on my list. But I have high hopes to get at least 2 done tomorrow, in between novel writing, and piano practicing. I’ve also vowed to keep the kitchen, living room and bedroom clean. J has been cleaning constnatly and I frankly can’t handle the guilt. He wont’ stop! Damn him! NOOO! Sigh… the things I have to put up wtih from that man. It’s almost too much for me.

I’ve dropped the Enya song from teh recital program. My teacher thought I shoudl concentrate on teh other one (ouch). But she gave me some good tips and a plan of attack, so I feel good about it.

What else? Made squash soup, bought some sexy peek toe black Tahari heels from TJ Maxx ($29!), watched Deja Vu (quite good actually), snuggled with the kitties, and let J have the last bit of wine that I didn’t drink on Thursday night. Decided again that I should quit drinking and instead of beating msyelf up about it, I’m just going to decide to keep deciding that I should stop drinking and maybe one day, I will actually do it! Habits are hard, man. But I quit smoking, so I rock. I also bought a book by the Dalai Lama called “how to see yourself as you really are.” So that will be my bedtime reading tonight. Well, it’s almsot 9, so I think I’ll go up and get ready for bed, bring up some magazines ,and  some books and just relax and try to heal from all that bowling!

Oh, and my mother in law bought me a $50 gift certificate to the local greenhouse! We haven’t gotten the veggies planted yet. In fact, haven’t even rototilled the poop in yet, but maybe manana. So I will probably buy the veggies with the certificate. Need to figure out what to plant first though. We will do much better this year!

too tired to blog. I just can’t survive without my 8 hours of sleep anymore. I feel ill I’m so tired. So, a quick post and off to beddie bye I go. A & J stopped by with a birthday present. Another journal : ), some candles, and a bell. That was sweet. They’re coming to my recital, which at this point I’m ambivalent about. I feel like I’ve already peaked and I’m just dead sick of those songs. I did buy a new book tonight…goodie goodie. From Back to someone else… Found a song I love love love called The Wild Horseman by Schumann. What is that from? Anyone know? Also working on Dallas Blues.

Work uneventful. I have my evaluation coming up in a month.

Saw a deer this morning on 24. It looked like it was going to jump out in front of me, which would’ve been bad considering I was in the matchbox civic. But it turned around. Oh, the Ohio Buckeyes are blooming. They’re gorgeous!! I want one! Gimme! Ok, I’m pooped. I’m hittin the hay.  

got home from piano (was a disaster), put on my pajama pants, poured a glass of wine, went out to check on the garden (nobody can see me, whoo hoo!) and the f-ing deer are destroying my shrubs. My favorite little poof ball chamaecyparis is being destroyed! Plus my arborvitae and my junipers…basically anything that’s rough and pokey. Very upset. The poof ball was the centerpiece of the whole damn thing. Next it will eat my favorite little tree. Buying deer repellant tomorrow and I’m going to put eddie’s cage around teh poof ball tonight.  I hate nature!! 

Oh well… as I alluded to, piano was disastrous. Forgot how to play tuxedo junction, freaked out, then she got my all upset about my timing on the other piece. Now half the f-ing world is coming to the recital and I’m totally unprepared. ack! I’m stressed. J’s on my case again about drinking. He had been doing so good about nagging. NOw I’m “one glass a wine” watch tonight. Enjoying my bogle petite sirah. Guitar teacher is giving me the cold shoulder. He wants me. He just doesn’t know it yet.

Got another (last) present today from U. A beautiful afghan that she made. It’s really nice. I’ll take a picture in a minute. And a framed picture of me and my nephew. aww.. she’s smart enough to know that a narcissist like me will only put up a picture that I’m in. ha ha… just kidding. 

Got to practice. I suck. I suck. I suck! 

See what happens when I open myself up to the possibilities of the world? good day!  

More birthday presents in the mail… this one from sam, whose birthday it actually is today. Need to call her but not sure what state she’s in (as in state of the nation, not state of mind). I’m feeling a little inadequate in the things I ordered straight from her wish list on amazon. she put together a beautiful packet for me - a book called Generation Loss by Elizabeth Hand that sounds awesome..”Hand explores the narrow boundary between artistic genius and madness in this gritty, profoundly unsettling literary thriller.” oohheeee! sounds like a winner! And a beautiful journal, some green apple soap, a cd she put together, and a book she already read (the kite runner). Oh, and a crunchie bar! yum. I sent her Flakes. ha ha… great minds thing a like. What more should I expect from my irish twin?

Well, that’s all. Finishing off the cheap wine.